Your Role Working with a Lawyer

I often tell clients that I am the expert on the law, but they are the expert on everything else. This may seem confusing when you hire a lawyer to be told that you are the expert. Yet, I stand by the statement. There are really two areas where you have expertise compared to your lawyer: facts and values.

No matter how hard I work, I will never know the facts as well as you. Partly because I learn most of the facts from you; partly because you have the context for the facts. One aspect of your factual superiority is the knowledge of your spouse. No matter how long or short your relationship has been, you have insights into your spouse your lawyer cannot compete with. This is critical information when trying to negotiate. A lawyer client relationship works best when there is an open relationship about the facts.

Values are important when making decisions. I can advise you on whether an offer is financially okay, but the analysis should not end there. You need to analyze the options through your value system. What impact will accepting/declining an offer will be not just a monetary decision and you should look at it from a variety of perspective. If you have kids, what value do you put on having a positive relationship with your spouse? What value do you put on ending the dispute versus continuing it? You must decide if an option is sufficient or if the cost of proceeding is worth it. This engages your value system.

So, what is your role when working with a lawyer? In the immortal words of Jerry Maguire, “help me help you!” The best lawyer client relationships work together seamlessly. Communication is key.